They Never Told Me That: Belonging

Most of us have plenty of acquaintances. Fewer of us have the kind of connection that actually feels like home. This monthly gathering for queer men creates the conditions for something more - a structured, intimate evening designed around one topic that doesn't get enough honest airtime.

This month: belonging. What it actually feels like, where we find it, and where we're still looking.

Your ticket includes a handcrafted wellness mocktail and an evening at 113 Spring designed to help you slow down, connect, and leave feeling a little more at home.

Come curious. Leave Connected.

The evening begins with arrival, mocktails, and open mingling before moving into a brief grounding practice to settle the room.

From there, the group moves through structured introductions, a short framing of the evening's theme, and two rounds of small-group conversation with new people each time.
A facilitated group reflection follows each breakout.

The evening closes with open mingling guided by conversation prompts and a short closing circle to integrate what came up.

The structure is intentional but light. Conversation does the work.

There are rarely spaces for gay men to meet and relate to one another through in-depth discussion, with the end goal being deeper personal understand and genuine community.

The themes explored in this discussion group change monthly - each gathering takes on a new topic (purpose, intimacy, friendship, reinvention) while the structure stays consistent.

It is not a networking event. It is not a support group.

It sits somewhere more dynamic: a space where strangers become familiar through honest conversation, and community begins to feel like something you can actually build.

Jon Pinney

Jon is a facilitator, speaker, and founder of The Vaulted Self, a platform built around helping people live with greater freedom, authenticity, and connection.

His work blends guided conversation, experiential practice, and intentional community design to create evenings that feel genuinely human rather than programmatic. He became passionate about building these kinds of spaces after years of navigating his own questions around identity and belonging - and noticing that the spaces he was looking for rarely existed.

His goal is simple: that everyone leaves feeling more connected than when they arrived.